Friday, January 6, 2012

My diet lately

I need a better way to keep track of time. Without tests and projects due, rotations are throwing me off. Since pretty much all I have to do is show up to my rotation site, there isn't too much to base the movement of time off of. I can't believe it's been almost a month since my last post.

I wanted to post tonight about what I've been eating lately because I've recently realized how horrible my diet is. So here it is:
-Bagels with peanut butter
-Cereal
-Healthy Choice Garlic Herb Shrimp frozen lunch
-Smart Ones Fettuccine Alfredo (I'm cutting this out as it's done more bad than good lately)

Did you get that? That's it. There are some random, snack-like foods I eat like Ritz Crackers with peanut butter or Wheat Thins, but that's about all I can handle lately. How sad is that? I usually end up having a bagel & peanut butter for breakfast and dinner every day and my Garlic Herb Shrimp for lunch. Every.single.day. EVERY F*CKING DAY.

I don't express my anger very often on here, but it is SO exasperating to have such a limited diet. I'm sure I could expand it somewhat, but A) I'm anything but a cook, so I don't know what else to try and B) I'm so afraid of something going horribly wrong after trying something new. If I had more time off to experiment, I would, but even though I have Friday and Saturday to try out new things, I've been sick or feeling sick every weekend.

I know for a fact I'm not getting enough calories or nutrients which is depressing. I got so close to my goal weight of 140 (I'm 5'10.5") but then started going back downhill again after I started having more episodes. Now I'm hanging out around 130. I don't like looking or feeling this thin. While people always ask me what I'm doing and then ignorantly say, "Well I wish I could have IBS so I could be that thin," I would give anything just to be able to gain some weight without making myself feel like hell.

I'm loving the Imodium because I don't have diarrhea anymore except around my period and when I forget to take it, but the other IBS symptoms are killing me. The gas pains/explosions are unbearable most of the time, and I still just get that sick feeling after eating something bad. Even though it doesn't end with diarrhea anymore, I still get the feeling that it's going to happen.

I need to take the time to sit down and find more meal options to add to my diet, but with Career Day for my pharmacy school coming up in a couple weeks, I'm too busy freaking out about the SIX interviews I have that day to make time for it or to have time to deal with the consequences of trying something that doesn't work out.

I'm just so tired of having such a boring diet. Does anyone have any tried and true meal choices that don't cause a ton of gas or diarrhea?